Unfaithful

My heart was a bit sad earlier this evening because of ongoing disappointment in the behavior of another person.  Now, I'm not talking about silly little stuff, but true challenge in an important relationship in my life.   You can't make people understand your heart, no matter how many times you try to explain.  And when someone's actions or inactions are hurtful,   You can become very frustrated with trying to get them to see when you're coming from.  Sometimes, if you're not careful, you can become cynical about relationships in general.  You can allow that pain to cause you to pull away from healthy relationships.   The craziest thing of all is that we can pull away from God when our hearts have been broken by man.  If you have never done that, you are blessed!  The truth is that I absolutely have done that, and I am tremendously blessed because God gave me revelation and allowed me to see that was exactly what I had done to Him.  Recently, one of the ministers at my church preached a message that talked about returning to God.  I was so convicted by that message, and came home and continued to meditate on the scripture in the second chapter of the book of Joel.  Father allowed me to see that I had begun to lose faith in Him because I was disappointed by man and circumstances.  But because of His mercy, I was able to repent, and give Him my whole heart again. What joy and freedom I immediately experienced!

“Trust in the LORD, and do good; Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.”

          Psalms 37:3 NKJV

 The dictionary definition of the word faithful is : True to one's word, promises, vows, etc.
 No matter what I have experienced, even in the worst times, and although I have been unfaithful to God, He has always been true to His word, His promises, and His vows.  So now, even when I am sad, disappointed, or hurt about another person's behavior toward me, I am learning to do what the Scripture says: feed on God's faithfulness.   To me, this simply means to meditate on and think and praise God for his constant faithfulness to what He has spoken to me.  I never have to fear because He promised never to leave or forsake me.


 Feeding on God's faithfulness is something that must be done consistently.  It brings strength, confidence in the Father, peace, and I am sure it pleases Him, which is very important to me.  It also increases faith.

Know this: God is NEVER unfaithful!! NEVER! NEVER!! NEVER!!   No matter what you may be facing, continually remind yourself, through reading the Scriptures, and listening to sermons that talk about the faithfulness of God, that He is indeed the One you can put full confidence in. Trust in God. Do what is right in His eyes. Dwell in peace where you are. And feed (continually) on His faithfulness. You won't regret it!!

The Right Kind of Dependence

This post is specifically for believers-and those who are coming into a relationship with Christ. There comes a time when you have to make the hard choice. Many around you who claim to be Christians are only part-time followers of Christ.  You see, being a true follower-a disciple of Jesus Christ means total surrender.  And total surrender is NOT an easy thing.

From the time we are babies, although most parents love nurturing a bundle of joy, we are consistently encouraged to become independent.  Use the potty.  Eat with a spoon.  Drink from a cup. Sleep in your own bed.  Walk. Verbalize what you want. Go off to preschool. Then kindergarten.  Middle school.  High school.  College.  And so on.  All that learning to find our self-confidence, and master life skills, and that's all good stuff.  But then there's faith.  Trust. Surrender. For some of us, these concepts are challenging.  I was raised by a single mom who adamantly taught us to be independent, to not ever be a burden to others, and that if you wanted something done right, you did it yourself. I had to be pretty grown-up at an early age. I was doing some of the food shopping and cooking dinner for the family when I was 12.  My mom worked 2 full-time jobs sometimes, and I was left to be the mature one in the house.  I love and appreciate all my mother did, and I don't fault her for any of that.  My dad was out of place, so our roles had to shift.  However, when I gave my life to The Lord at 14, and for many, many years afterwards, even until recently, I struggled with my faith.  Trust wasn't something that came easy to me, and I had learned to depend mostly on the one person I thought I could trust: me.  But I found out that I cannot really be trusted with myself--not totally.

So, eventually it got a little easier to trust God--not that He EVER gave me a reason not to trust Him. But life can throw you some serious curveballs, and sometimes I just wanted the craziness to stop. Through all the trials, I found there were less and less comforts to depend on--and less people to lean on. As a matter of fact, each and every crutch I found-friends, food, hubby--everything--has been taken away.  There have been recent times when I literally felt like I was losing it.

The thing is, God wants us to only put our full trust and hope in Him.  One thing about losing lots of things in your life is that you will learn to give your total heart to The Father, or you will keep looking for a crutch to help you cope. I'm excited and grateful because God is showing me that He is answering my prayers.  Through my pain, loss, and hardship, I have come face-to-face with the real me, and I am choosing to allow Him to to take every crutch, and heal the areas in my heart that were still damaged, and my faith is flourishing! I have given Him my heart again-completely this time, and I find rest in my Savior.